Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Moving forward

It's been said several times by various people in our GriefShare group that we don't move on, we move forward. Each step forward is painful, but necessary for healing. I liken it to a burn victim or amputee participating in physical therapy. Painful, but necessary. My "PT" today was making homemade bread...for the first time in over 3 months. While the bread was rising, I went into the shower and cried. I believe another session of "PT" will be writing out condolence thank you cards. Again, painful, but necessary.

I met with another mother last night who lost her 15yo. son just over a year ago. For the bereaved, grief forges an instant bond between strangers. It is a reluctant, yet comforting encounter when two grieving souls meet. We talked of our loved ones and spoke of God's grace in our sorrow. We both emphatically agreed that having had His word hidden in our hearts has been one of the reasons we have been able to move forward.

As much as we want time to stand still, as it did at the moment of our loss, it cannot. For the bereaved, healing must happen. The hard work of grief must take place. "PT" must have its place even if difficult and exhausting. Moving on doesn't mean the loss is gone. Moving on means learning a new way of walking, though this time with scars. It means trusting God because He, and only He, is trustworthy. I am reminded of a stanza from our pastor's poem The World Stood Still Today.

The time came to start the clock again
We didn’t want to, but we had no choice
Slowly, painfully we moved
We moved back into the flow of time

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