Monday, November 7, 2011

A rant on grief

I hate grief. I hate the way it turns your life upside down. I hate the effect it has on you. I hate what it does to a person. I used to sleep fine. I used to be in charge of my emotions. I used to think I was strong. I hate being sucker-punched by waves of grief. I hate how it reminds you of milestones and events you will never celebrate with your loved one. I hate what grief steals from you.

This world is broken. And that is why we have grief. A broken world was NOT in the original plan. This wasn't how things were supposed to be. But it is what it is. So what do we do with it? We hang onto hope.

This weekend was spent at Hearts of Hope grief camp. It angers me that we even had to be there. Yet I am so very thankful for places like this, for people that understand, for the reminder that this, too, shall pass.

While the kids were at camp, Dh and I were at a parent seminar all day Saturday on "How to Raise a Grieving Child." There was a ton of valuable information. One very powerful statement I heard was "You don't ever get over it. You get through it."

It was a rough weekend filled with much emotion. But Dh and I knew we needed to do this for our kids. They needed it. For them, it was great fun. Children do not grieve the same as adults. While adults carry grief constantly, kids handle it in bursts. The fun was scattered throughout the weekend with various activities. They got to tie-dye t-shirts, make a memory plaque, participate in a candle lighting ceremony, write their thoughts on an "anger wall" and a "love wall" and scale a climbing wall. They also learned about hope and that they are not alone. We were all reminded that grief doesn't get the last word. Hope does.

1Cor. 13:13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
Heb. 10:23 Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.
Heb 11:1 Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

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