Monday, August 15, 2011

Paying for grief

I remember how shocked I was at the bill from the mortuary the day we met to plan our oldest son's memorial. (And it was only half the bill!) I thought how ironic it was that not only do we have to grieve, but that we have to pay for it! The mortuary has a fee, the cemetery has a fee, and the monument company has a fee. I remember, too, being surprised at finding money in the condolence cards. I was ignorant of that fact until now.

Grief is not only complicated, it's a learning experience. Maybe if our society wasn't so "separated" from death, it wouldn't be such a shock. Death, in our society, is kept so separate. No longer do dying loved ones live with us. They are closed away in nursing homes, and not only that, but in separate, closed-off sections of the "home"! The dying lay in hospital beds, again, in separate corridors from the living.

It rather angers me that we've done that as a society. This society that values so much instead the "fountain of youth", the never-ending search to stay young. It's such an earthly perspective. Earthly vs. eternal. Quite a difference.

This morning I was thinking of the fact that we have these "deathly" fees to pay, and I thought of Christ. Of the price He paid. Romans 6:23 says: "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Jesus paid for our sins. It cost him. It cost him his life. He understands full well what Dh and I are going through and the cost involved. 

I take comfort, however, in that verse above because in the same sentence, you see that death exacts a price, but eternal life is free. What a contradiction! God gives us LIFE and it's FREE.  Jesus speaking in John 10:10  also says, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." I need to remember that my son is alive! He is alive in Christ, alive in heaven, for all eternity. And some day, because I have believed and trusted in Jesus as my Lord and Savior, I, too, will join him. I will see my beloved son again. And what joy that will be.


  1. You are blessed with the gift of words...I am blessed with the gift of your friendship, and I get to read from the perspective that you give.
    Thanks for sharing.

  2. thank you for sharing... amen & amen...